Sunday, January 19, 2014

Faith, trust and pixie dust.

Faith, trust and pixie dust. The three keys to every Disney happy ending, right? But what if we don't live in a Disney movie. What if we live in real life? Then what do you do? Did Walt Disney prepare us for this? Maybe not, but our parents did. Our teachers, Sunday school teachers, aunts, uncles and cousins all did. And so did God. There comes a point when we have to start teaching ourselves. Every day we learn life lessons, we just don't always take it as such.
Faith, such a huge little principle in life that we don't usually have. The great thing about faith? You don't have to be religious to have faith. You don't even have to believe in God. Faith is just that small (or big and mighty!) little tinder of hope. I have faith all the time. Faith that I'll graduate x ray school, that I'll find a big girl job. To me that's important to have faith in. But bigger and better things to have faith in? Myself, my life, and God. This may be harsh and rough for some people to read, but the last year I lost a lot of faith in myself. I went through a bad breakup, lost my self esteem, lost a lot of weight, and I didn't even know if I would make it day to day. That's when God stepped in. I didn't know what else to do. But to pray. To pray for some kind of help or guidance that I needed to be "okay" again. And here I am, months and lots of rocky roads later, healthy and happy. I've always been a firm believer in God and in the faith. I was raised LDS, but I also believe that we need to discover things for ourselves. I have no doubt in my mind that I believe in God, I've just been exploring the way I worship him and love him, which is okay too! Back to having faith in yourself, I think that goes hand and hand with having faith in God. I couldn't do it alone and I thank Him everyday that I realized that before it was too late. Having faith in myself and in my life is something big I've been working in and I've been continuing to work on every day. I have to take the time I've noticed to do stuff for me, to make ME happy again. Those hour long runs I go on in the park not only help me to be happy but they make me realize and appreciate the little things. "Woah, God created this?" Constantly runs through my head. Having faith is something that never stops growing. There is no bar that says "hey, you've reached your limit, no more faith for you!" Fortunately we can always keep growing, growing and loving ourselves, our lives, each other and God.
Trust. That's something I lack a lot. I don't "trust" many people. It may make me look like an emo ridden troubled girl in her young 20s (I do love black) but that's not the case. Trust is a huge thing and I don't think enough people take it seriously. Why would you want to break someone's trust? I wouldn't. When someone has trust in me, I take that as an honor. That this person trusts me enough to share part of their life with me, right? Why would I ever want to do something to break that? But unfortunately not everyone thinks like I do (thanks mom and dad for raising me right!) and not everyone has the right intentions. Having trust, also goes hand in hand with having faith. You have faith, that this person that you TRUST, won't hurt you, won't lie, cheat or steal. You have trust in God that you're doing his will, and what he wants. You trust your mom and dad with your life and big decisions, and you trust your little sister with your biggest secrets. People take trust and faith for granted, and I for one don't want to live my life like that anymore.
Pixie dust. That's not even a real thing, right? Pixie dust may not be really real, but being a kid at heart is always fun! I mean those nerf guns sitting in the corner at my parents house aren't so I can act my age! Have fun when and while you can!
I guess the point of this blog was that I'm sitting on an airplane with a lot of jumbled up thoughts like usual floating around my scatter brain. I can be smart and deep when I want to be, so I hope that somebody got something out of this!

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